Three predictions as the NFL season kicks off: 1) Disgruntled Albert Haynesworth will try to stomp his new coach, Mike Shanahan, but will fail because he’s out of shape; 2) Cowboys owner Jerry Jones will have more plastic surgery than his cheerleaders; 3) Carson Palmer will have ear plugs permanently installed in order to tune out the wide receivers in his ears.

The contenders: There are times Ohio State plays like I feel after guzzling NyQuil. You know, like zombies. Saturday was not one of those times. The Buckeyes played fast and looked very interested in an impressive 36-24 dismantling of Miami (The U).

Other than the punt and kickoff teams — whose practices this week could be longer than Braylon Edwards’ beard — OSU resembled a national title contender. Terrelle Pryor didn’t look like Dan Marino, but he didn’t turn over the ball over, either.

Up north: Notre Dame had a shot at a miracle finish against Michigan, but the Irish fired the football out of the end zone on the final play. It was closer to Touchdown Jesus than a receiver.

Meanwhile, Denard Robinson looks like a serious upgrade at quarterback for Michigan.

Elk country: There still might be fans trying to get out of Centerville High School’s parking lot after Friday’s blockbuster between the Elks and Alter.

What a great atmosphere. The place was packed — one estimate was 12,000 — and a couple hundred fans watched from a hillside, just like at the Sun Bowl. Congrats to both schools for making the game happen.

Center of it all: Nick Mangold’s new contract with the Jets is worth $55 million, but I’d be surprised if Mangold starts acting like Paris Hilton. I ran into Mangold a couple years ago in New Orleans while he was signing autographs before the Ohio State-LSU national title game.

Mangold was very gracious with the fans and came off as a regular guy. Refreshing.

Quick hits: Watch out for those Dakota teams. Last week, North Dakota State knocked off Kansas. On Saturday, South Dakota put up 41 points and upset Minnesota. ... The U.S. Open tennis marathon should finish up soon. I think. It seems like it’s been going on since the All-Star break.

Contact this reporter at (937) 225-2163 or bkollars@DaytonDailyNews.com.