OxfordPress.com

HAMILTON — Since his brother Marlin Rockhold was killed nearly five years ago in Iraq, Derrick Henderson said he doesn't talk about the war to most people.

The 23-year-old Hamilton resident was killed by a sniper while directing traffic in Baghdad on May 8, 2003, becoming Butler County's first casualty in Iraq.

Henderson said it's not grief that silences him. While initially sad, the Forest Park man said he's been able to get over his brother's death because he knows he's in a better place. Rather, Henderson said he doesn't discuss the war because people are so misinformed it's "disgusting."

"A lot of people don't understand what (being in the armed forces is) about. They think it's, I don't know, a dumb decision, and that's just ignorant," he said.

While he doesn't think most people understand the war, Henderson does agree when people say it's time for United States forces to leave. He thinks the U.S. entered the war on false pretenses and cannot solve a conflict that has been raging for thousands of years.

He pays more attention to news about the war and other international events since his brother's death. Rockhold's uncle, Lew Henderson, expressed similar thoughts.

"In the back of my mind, any time I hear any talk or debate or any news (about Iraq), that makes me think about Marlin and that's every day," Lew Henderson said.

Despite the time since Rockhold's death, Lew Henderson said he is still grieving for his nephew.

"I don't know how long it would take a person to get over that," he said. "After five years, I still haven't gotten over that."

Lew Henderson said the support the family received from the community after Rockhold's death has lessened his grief. Derrick Henderson said then-Gov. Bob Taft addressed the family personally, as did numerous other high-ranking politicians and military officers.

Search for purpose

The military was supposed to be Rockhold's chance at a better life, Derrick Henderson said. Rockhold was recently married and caring for a stepdaughter when he joined the armed forces.

"That's what he chose to do. It was a way out of a rut. He wanted a career and he wanted family and he wanted purpose," Derrick Henderson said.

Now 24, Derrick Henderson has taken that search for purpose upon himself. He said he is looking for a legacy to leave for himself that would honor the legacy his brother left.

Aside from a replica of Rockhold's dog tags that he wears around his neck, Derrick Henderson doesn't keep many mementos of Rockhold around. In fact, he still has pictures that he hasn't developed and has only been to Rockhold's grave once.

"That's his vessel in the ground," Derrick Henderson said. "That doesn't do me any justice going down there talking to or spending time at a cemetery."

Instead, he said he doesn't dwell on his brother's death, but on his life and how he lived it. That idea is why he wears the dog tags, Derrick Henderson said. People will ask him if he's in the service and it gives him an opportunity to tell them about his brother.

Contact this reporter at (513) 820-2190 or jrinaldi@coxohio.com.