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Home > Blogs > Adventures in Motherhood > Archives > 2010 > February > 16 > Entry
Motherhood Mindlessness: is it a myth?
Before I had children, my friends who had already embarked on the voyage of parenting would tell me, “Just wait until you have kids!”
Often, this was said while I was laughing at them for forgetting something so simple like their own address.
Now as a mom myself … I seem to have a chorus of crickets following me around.
I have mastered the “blank stare” when I am questioned about nearly anything, and am lucky I haven’t left the house in my pajamas yet.
My children have suffered most of all from my over-the-top case of “mom brain.” Noah has been sent to school without his lunch, Nicholas has missed out on multiple show-and-tell days and occasionally, the baby has been swaddled in the same mushy diaper for … well, a while.
Noah has a pretty good grasp on the daily routine and keeps me in check, “Mom, you already gave us vitamins today.”
And, thankfully, my husband pays the bills.
I googled “mom brain” and a few other like-terms, and found some interesting things.
One mom became so forgetful she had the birth dates of her five children tattooed on her arm.
Another mom in Florida drove home from a department store and returned 90-minutes later to retrieve her 1-month-old baby.
I also found that “Mom-brain” isn’t just an excuse for those of us in the profession who forget to drop Junior at his piano lesson - it begins with pregnancy and has been scientifically researched.
Julie Henry, a psychologist at the University of New South Wales, said lifestyle may be a factor, as is sleep deprivation.
Of course, some researchers still claim “mom brain” is a myth. Dr. Ros Crawley said “maternal amnesia” may be due to “cultural expectations of impairments which make women more aware of forgetting things and attributing such mistakes to their pregnancy.”
I think they are both right on.
Had I not heard of mommy memory loss before I had children, I’d likely just be attributing my mindlessness to lack of sleep.
On the flip side, while I am forgetful, I am sometimes stunned by the amount of things I do remember - birth dates being one of them (no tattoos for me), what clothes go in which sons dresser, how many diapers are left, to feed the dog, take and distribute vitamins, doctor appointments, who needs more fiber in their diet, to clip 60 tiny finger and toe nails, who picked the last movie, to feed the fish (sometimes), stock the diaper bag, write a weekly column, feed the fish, take vitamins … Oops! Did I already say that?
I forgot.
Email this contributing writer at Motherhoodcolumn@yahoo.com.
Permalink | Comments (9) | Post your comment | Categories: Motherhood Column
Comments
By Cathlene Martin
February 17, 2010 2:28 PM | Link to this
I truly believe in baby brain. My son Wyatt is only three months old. I use to work in a office I use to take care of other people as a HR and Admin Assistant. Now I forget to put the clothes in the dryer and take them out.
By Kari
February 17, 2010 12:14 PM | Link to this
After my second it was really bad. I too have mastered the blank stare. My brain is saying what it needs to, but there is a disconnect from brain to mouth. I hate it and I have cried many nights due to this momnesia! I used to remember things exactly…. who was there, what they wore…etc, now I can’t.
By angela
February 17, 2010 4:39 AM | Link to this
Well I guess spelling can now be one of mine lol seeing by my last post
By angela
February 17, 2010 4:36 AM | Link to this
I tend to call mine at times their sbis name, which dont go well if I am talking to one of my daughters and call her by her bothers name.
By Busy Mom
February 16, 2010 9:32 PM | Link to this
I agree - I think it’s not so much how much we’re forgetting but that we suddenly have SO much more to remember! I think we are much more mindful than we know - yeah we may forget stuff, but proportionally I think we come out ahead.
By Ginger7
February 16, 2010 7:50 PM | Link to this
Darci, I love your column! Sad to say that this malady continues into grandparenthood too. Now I have something to blame it on and my kids can’t totally blame it on “old age.
By Sara
February 16, 2010 4:21 PM | Link to this
Oooooooooooh, so true! Good to know I am not alone!
By Mr. Mom
February 16, 2010 3:50 PM | Link to this
It is easy to slip up and overlook 1 of the 100,000 things moms do. Percentage wise not too bad.
By ang
February 16, 2010 2:14 PM | Link to this
Momnesia! Yes it is true!