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Home > Blogs > Adventures in Motherhood > Archives > 2009 > June > 11
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Son’s interest in beer gives Mom a headache
One week, films about puberty; the next week, beer. Life does move fast.
My husband said to me the other day, “I think I am going to lay off the beer for a while,” and then he nodded toward our 10-year-old son in the other room. “Somebody’s showing a little too much interest in it.”
At first, I felt the need to remind my husband that he should do what he wants, since there are separate rules for kids and adults for good reason.
Besides, I thought, he is just a curious young kid, and my husband’s drinking is moderate at most.
But then I started mulling over some of the recent comments from the shorter male; the one who still smells of fourth grade. I thought about how he has mentioned a few times when we were out at restaurants that the beer “looked good” and asked questions about the various brands.
And I remembered his love and subsequent recounting to anyone who would listen of the many humorous beer commercials that heavily punctuate the innumerable sports shows he watches.
Then there was that team pizza party earlier this month, when my son and a couple of his friends thought it was really funny to keep pretending to steal the pitcher of beer on the parents’ table.
After cataloging these incidents, I agreed that maybe the situation probably could use a little addressing.
But I wasn’t sure how to go about that. And I didn’t know if my mom’s handling of similar circumstances would be as acceptable today.
When I was a kid, my mom introduced me and my siblings to wine when we were much younger than my sons are now.
She wanted us to have a more worldly view and appreciation of alcohol, and noted that kids drank wine in Europe and had less incidence of alcohol abuse.
We kids thought it was cool that we got to have wine, but also thought it tasted horrible. We much preferred grape juice or soda — anything with more sugar in it. (Come to think of it, my siblings and I still prefer drinks with more sugar in them.)
My mom also introduced us to cigarettes, but with a wholly different intention. She and my father were longtime smokers, and my mom did not want us to follow down that path. She figured she would let us try the ever-present items and stem our curiosity.
I had my first cigarette at age 6, and it was nearly my last (I’ll admit there were a couple more in college). I believe it was the only cigarette my younger brother ever had. One and done at age 5.
As for beer, I asked for a sip when I was around 12, and my stepfather gave me one. I thought it tasted even worse than the wine (although it was Natural Light, and now I wonder if that brand choice was intentional), and it effectively ended my childhood interested in beer.
But, even though I emerged from my childhood a little wiser and relatively unscathed, I don’t feel comfortable following that same course of action with my kids.
These days, a good 30 years later, it is largely frowned upon, and possibly illegal, to give my sons a cigarette or even a sip of beer.
But I do think action is in order. And, I don’t think the root of it is my husband or I changing our moderate drinking habits — in fact, that might even make the practice even more taboo and alluring.
I think the action will have to come in the form of discussion, and will include the things I learned in my childhood as well as information on the subject from this century.
Even though that might be a drier way to go than I experienced, at least it will be honest and direct.
And this way, I can be sure that none of us will get arrested.
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